the best part about being in your 20’s is slowly caring less and less about what people think of you and surrounding yourself with good people
the worst is that I’m broke
- friend who lives hundreds of miles away: i made food
- me: can i have some
Johnny Depp (via enemaroberts)
Their faces, I just can’t
"i can’t eat that, i’ll get fat"
"i can’t sleep in late today i have to do work"
"no i can’t watch a whole season in one go that’s lazy"
men: rape jokes hahaha! beating women haha! lol make me a sandwich whore! put on makeup fugly! hahaha!
women: those aren’t funny.
men: lighten up, it’s a joke wow must be on her period women are so emotional lol
women: i drink the tears of men, haha!
men: hOW DARE YOU. HOW DARE YOU PROMOTE THE SUFFERING OF US MEN? DO YOU KNOW WHAT WE HAVE DONE FOR YOU? YOU WOULD BE NOTHING WITHOUT US. THATS NOT FUNNY AT ALL
RIP to the thousands of turkeys being slaughtered in the name of “giving thanks” and “peace on earth”.
And RIP to all the Native Americans who are completely forgotten/have their genocide glamorized and covered up by this holiday
RIP to my asshole after all the food is done being digested
RIP to my bussy after getting pounded by my cousin in the bathroom after thanksgiving dinner